He Says/She Says: Batman: Earth One (Volume 1)

22 Thursday Nov 2012

Posted by in Books, ComicBooks, He Says/She Says

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He Says

By Thom Yee

Batman: Earth One images courtesy of DC Comics

Batman is a jerk!

That hallowed little missive, famously uttered by Kitty Pryde about Professor X during Chris Claremont’s classic X-Men run, rung through my ears as I read Batman:  Earth One.  A jerk and a moron.  What an idiot.  My favourite parts of Batman:  Earth One all involved Batman generally screwing up.  I laughed out loud twice within the first eight pages as I watched Batman misfire his batline and then miss his jump to the next rooftop as he chased after his target.  Geoff Johns’ initial Earth One story begs the classic question from Grant Morrison’s impenetrable Seven Soldiers series, “How do you know you’re a super-hero and not a crazy fetish person with a death wish?”  Of course all of this X-Men and Seven Soldiers talk means nothing to anyone not well versed in the comic world.  And, ostensibly, the Earth One books are all about appealing to people without such knowledge.

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Fifty Shades of Grey

21 Wednesday Nov 2012

Posted by in Books, Recent Books

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By Grace Crawford

Fifty Shades of Grey image courtesy of Vintage Books

Warning: due to the nature of this book, there is some strong language and mature content in the review that follows.

Against my better judgement, I recently finished reading the much-touted Fifty Shades of Grey series.  I’m serious; there is so much touting that I went against my better judgement and actually borrowed a friend’s Kindle so I could read in public without others knowing what I was up to (I have a very well-developed sense of shame).  Suppressing the urge to vomit pretty much non-stop for the last few days, I formed some very strong opinions about the books.  I will share these with you now, whether you like it or not.  Spoiler alert:  everybody has sex.

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Once Upon A Time (Season 1)

21 Wednesday Nov 2012

Posted by in Television

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By Grace Crawford

Once Upon a Time images courtesy of Disney-ABC Domestic Television

SPOILER ALERT: … I spoil everything.

For the last year or so, I’d been meaning to watch Once Upon a Time.  I’m a sucker for a good fairy tale, and I’m not ashamed of it, because I’m a Utero-Canadian and I can do literally whatever I want.  It was actually a surprisingly well-kept secret.  I think the first time I heard of it was an ad in a magazine I was idly flipping through during a haircut, at which time I took note of it and went right back to judging the Kardashians, who I think may have still been relevant in late 2011.  Since then I’ve seen a couple of ads before other programs I somehow found the time to watch, but it basically flew under the radar for me, and probably for a lot of other people.  Then my mother went out of town for four days, and instead of doing my homework and keeping up with the housework, that sneaky voice in the back of my head piped up and said, “Screw that, let’s sit around and watch some motherf***ing fairy tales.”  So I listened to it, and I watched some motherf***ing fairy tales.  And I have to tell you…

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She Says/He Says: How I Met Your Mother (Episodes 1&2)

20 Tuesday Nov 2012

Posted by in He Says/She Says, Television

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She Says

By Grace Crawford

How I Met Your Mother images courtesy of 20th Television

Man, friggin’ Ted. I may as well tell you right off the bat that this guy is a colossal douchecanoe.  He’s got some funny quirks and charms, but for the most part you just want to slap the guy.  So we’re going to skip past him and on to his friends.

Marshall and Lily are a single unit.  They are basically male and female forms of the same individual; no real-life couple could function this well or be this perfect for one another.  They can be nauseatingly adorable or surprisingly dirty, redefining what a couple can and should be.  Robin is a Canadian stereotype with Daddy issues and a love for handguns and fine cigars, and I want to be exactly like her when I grow up.  Barney is awesome (I’m serious; were you to ask him to describe himself, not only would you be a crazy person for asking a fictional character to speak to you, but he would talk back, and he would tell you that he is indeed awesome).

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She Says/He Says: Firefly (Pilot Episode)

20 Tuesday Nov 2012

Posted by in He Says/She Says, Television

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She Says

By Grace Crawford

Firefly images courtesy of 20th Television

Anyone who knows me can tell you: when someone asks me why I like something, I can only look at them in absolute confusion and say, “Because it’s awesome.”  I lack the words to explain myself, but for your sake, Thom, I will attempt to explain myself, since I’d rather you didn’t think that I told you to watch Firefly just to torture you.  Firefly is, quite simply, a show like no other.  It’s a space Western. It’s the story of nine people adrift in a universe fringed by black, devoid of the basic morals that governed Earth-that-was, but with a code of honour that you can’t help but identify with.  They struggle to get by, proving that no matter how technologically advanced humanity becomes, no matter how far out into the vast reaches of space we push, we will always struggle to find a place in the world, no matter how large it’s become.  I want you to watch this show because it spoke to me like no other show ever has.  It’s about the little guy.  In the pilot episode, people are chased by Feds, shot, and killed (though these three things don’t necessarily happen to the same person).  One character expresses skepticism about how this can be considered a win.  Another character replies, “We’re still flying, aren’t we?” It may not be much, but “it’s enough.”  It’s about survival.  After its untimely demise, the show still survives a decade later.  Time hasn’t worn away at it.  It’s a classic.  It’s brilliant writing.  It’s cold, hard truth-telling.  It’s real life… a few years down the line.  Enjoy the show.

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