Tag Archives: Horror

The Mummy (2017) review

17 Saturday Jun 2017

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Shouldn’t somebody be saying “There’s a storm coming”?

by Thom Yee

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The Mummy (2017) images courtesy of Universal Pictures

The odds are you’re never going to talk to Tom Cruise.  I mean, that’s pretty obvious from the perspective of logic and reason and cosmological significance — the odds are you’re never going to talk to a lot of people, important or otherwise.  Even you and I are probably never going to meet or have a conversation (and you come here to read our reviews all the time, don’t you?). What I mean when I say you’re never going to talk to Tom Cruise is that you’re never going to get to know Tom Cruise.  You’re never really going to meet him.  Maybe you’ll be allowed to ask him a question if you’re lucky and get chosen out of a crowd at a press junket, maybe you’ll hear what seems like a personal anecdote about him from someone you know who works in Hollywood, but Tom Cruise, a world-famous actor, a franchise unto himself and an icon who’s likely to spend the rest of his life in the public eye and leave a body of movie work behind that will be watched, loved, and even studied for generations after?  That’s not someone you’ll ever have a personal conversation with or learn a lot about even if you do somehow find yourself in a position to say something to him. Continue reading →

Kong: Skull Island review

18 Saturday Mar 2017

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‘Twas beauty killed the—what’s that. He’s still alive? Oh… well never mind then.

by Thom Yee

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Kong: Skull Island images courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures

So, I’ve never actually seen the original King Kong, not all the way through or all in one sitting at least. That’s not something I regret either despite being ‘the movie guy’ in my group of friends and despite being a person who prides himself on his knowledge of movie history. It may ultimately be a failing on my part, but I just don’t have a great deal of patience when it comes to the classics, and, as has been the case with Citizen Kane, The Graduate, or Scarface, I doubt that I’m going to see the original King Kong anytime soon. I’ve seen parts of it of course, the same way we’ve all watched an episode of The Big Bang Theory, pressed the wrong floor in a cramped elevator, or eaten at Subway, but there was never any intentionality behind those viewings, so while I have a pretty good idea of what the movie was about, I don’t really know what people see in it. But I have seen the 2014 Godzilla. Continue reading →

Get Out review

04 Saturday Mar 2017

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You cool like dat? I’m cool like that.

by Thom Yee

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Get Out images courtesy of Universal Pictures

One of the most cogent and convincing arguments I’ve ever heard in my life was about cheating:

“If you can take advantage of a situation in some way, it’s your duty … to do it. Why should the race always be to the swift, or the Jumble to the quick-witted? Should they be allowed to win merely because of the gifts God gave them? Well I say, ‘Cheating is the gift man gives himself.'”

Eugenics isn’t explicit in that statement, but I think it is implicit, and eugenics, or at least the idea of pre-determining a preferred path based on your beliefs on superior genetic traits, is an idea at the core of Get Out. Continue reading →

Split review

28 Saturday Jan 2017

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They say this one has a surprise ending

by Thom Yee

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Split images courtesy of Universal Pictures

I’ve been a big fan of writer/director M. Night Shyamalan ever since his first movie. Well, actually, that’s not true, I’ve never seen Wide Awake, the Rosie-O’Donnel-led comedy he wrote and directed from 1998, nor did I even know about his 1992-released Praying with Anger until I bothered to look up his film credits. No, the M. Night Shyamalan I’m speaking of, the one we’re probably all thinking of when we dig into the rosier side of our movie memories, is the storyteller, the wunderkind, “The Next Spielberg”, the man who brought us The Sixth Sense. And… actually, I never saw The Sixth Sense either. ‘Cause somebody told me how it ends. I still look back on those early Shyamalan movies fondly, however, because even if I was never able to experience what it was like to sit in one of those theatres in 1999 — without any expectations as I beheld a gritty, suspenseful, unexpectedly well-told movie about seeing dead people with a monumental twist ending that would change everything — I had a pretty similar experience when I did see his follow-up, Unbreakable, the year after. Without anyone spoiling it. Continue reading →

Green Room review

10 Saturday Sep 2016

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What a bunch of jackasses

by Thom Yee

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Green Room images courtesy of A24

I’m a pretty critical person, both in real life (of hypocrisy, bureaucracy, “the man”) and in writing (with movies, TV… y’know, all the easier stuff we discuss on this website), but one thing I’ve usually stayed away from and we’ve generally steered clear of here on GOO Reviews is music criticism. There’s just something about the culture of music (a lot of things actually) that makes an honest, heartfelt analysis of it a really difficult thing to do for anyone who’s written for this website (at least so far), and it’s just something we’ve largely been able to avoid to this point. Until now, until I watched Green Room, a movie in many ways about music.

So here it goes. Continue reading →

Fear the Walking Dead — Grotesque recap

22 Monday Aug 2016

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Why I’m Dropping… Fear the Walking Dead season 2

by Thom Yee

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Fear the Walking Dead images courtesy of AMC

Truth be told, I’d been thinking about it for a while. Or more precisely, I’d thought about dropping Fear the Walking Dead once before and then once again now, and those two passing thoughts were easily enough to convince me to drop the show, because, really, who’s thinking that much about Fear the Walking Dead anyway? To be honest, even I, someone who’s reviewed every episode of the show since it debuted late last summer, had almost completely forgotten about it and was actually kind of taken off guard when I saw that it was coming back to finish the back half of its second season this past weekend. Continue reading →

Ghostbusters (2016) review

23 Saturday Jul 2016

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Women Ghostbusters? What’s next, a female Slimer?

by Thom Yee

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Ghostbusters (2016) images courtesy of Columbia Pictures

Do you guys actually think the original Ghostbusters was that good? ‘Cause I don’t. It’s overly casual and fairly shallow, it’s slow and meandering, and its ultimate resolution, crossing the streams, is a placeholder of an ending that ties into nothing else in the movie other than an earlier passing mention not to. No, it’s not a great movie in most of the usual, identifiable, quantifiable measures we like to apply to movies, and there’s only one significant reason why anyone likes it. Luckily, it’s the only reason that matters, and that’s that it works. For some reason, the 1984 Ghostbusters just works in a way that engages you, keeps you watching, makes you laugh, and even gives you an odd sense of contentment, and that’s an extremely rare thing to create let alone recreate. Continue reading →

Fear the Walking Dead – Shiva recap

23 Monday May 2016

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by Thom Yee

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Fear the Walking Dead images courtesy of AMC

2×07: “Shiva”

There’s a very specific type of melancholy that I’ve always felt during this time of the year as the days got longer, the darkness waned, and summer continued its inevitable approach. It’s too bright!  It’s too damned hot! And most of our favourite TV shows have finished their seasons. In one respect, however, we’ve come very, very far from that place, with summer television programming giving us some of the most acclaimed and most anticipated new series in recent history, as well as a brand new episode of one of our greatest shows only yesterday forever changing our feelings on the words, “Hold the door!”

All of which is another way of saying Fear the Walking Dead sucks. Continue reading →