Opening this Weekend
This Weekend’s Box Office Predictions
- Blair Witch
- Bridget Jones’s Baby
- When the Bough Breaks
What You Should See
Look man, I don’t care how scary the idea of the NSA monitoring every aspect of our (well, their) lives is, I don’t care how accurate or inaccurate this movie is in portraying what really happened, and I don’t care if the broader implications of the whole thing should make us re-evaluate our views of those in charge, nothing is going to make me sit through Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s weird, off-putting, deep-throat-style Snowden voice. God I hate how he sounds in Snowden. That said, I really don’t care about the movie, and, probably, neither should you. I mean, our NSA is just a slo-pitch league. Or maybe that’s what they want us to believe. Either way, not going to see it.
In other new release news, a new Blair Witch is opening a mere 16 years after the last installment, and a new Bridget Jones is opening a mere 12 years after its last installment. I also don’t care. About either. And maybe not anything anymore other than the hate I feel for Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s Snowden voice. That voice is tearing me apart (Lisa)!