Opening this Weekend

The Happytime Murders

Little Italy

A.X.L.

Papillon

The Bookshop

Box Office Predictions

  1. Crazy Rich Asians
  2. The Happytime Murders
  3. The Meg
  4. Mile 22
  5. Mission: Impossible — Fallout

What You Should See

Hayden Christensen!

I think that’s the most important takeaway for this weekend’s new movies as we’ve got a new romantic comedy, Little Italy, starring the aforementioned traitor Jedi alongside [the 10-years-younger] Emma Roberts in a Canadian-American co-production debuting first here in Canada, almost a full month before its September 21st American opening.  It’s always interesting when we get movies earlier here in Canada than in America as it’s a gap in time that we’re rarely afforded in the Great White North.  Because why would we?  How do these things happen?  How could this be?  What infernal machinations led to this astounding turn of events?  How?  How?!  Why?  Why?!  Whyyyy?!?!?!

That said, I wouldn’t see it.  Hayden f*cking Christensen!

It’s a decidedly mediocre weekend overall for new movies, all of which I have very little to say about, so I’m just going to list the rest here along with their usual Rotten Tomatoes links:

The Happytime Murders.

A.X.L.

Papillon.

The Bookshop.

Don’t see any of them.

Maybe go see to this last weekend of The Fringe instead.  I wouldn’t, but I know a lot of you guys like that stuff.  I just ask that, if you must go to The Fringe, maybe think twice before jaywalking across Gateway Boulevard.  Yes, jaywalking is one of the finest things a person can do, but ooonly if you do it right.  Don’t get in the way.  Don’t dart into the street out of nowhere.  Don’t putz along like you’re entitled to eff up the flow of everyone else on the road.  I feel like we really need to raise awareness of this epidemic of bad jaywalking.

Advertisements