Opening this Weekend

The Meg

Slender Man

BlacKkKlansmen

Dog Days

The Miseducation of Cameron Post

Getting Grace

Lu Over the Wall

Box Office Predictions

  1. The Meg
  2. Mission: Impossible — Fallout
  3. Christopher Robin
  4. BlacKkKlansman
  5. Slender Man

What You Should See

We’re in the endgame now.

If you’re the type of person to pay attention to movie pundits like I do, this weekend marks a memorial of sorts — It’s the end of our chances to be excited for The Meg, the heartwarming tale of a 75-foot Megalodon shark that wants to eat all humans, because we now have to face the reality of the movie actually being in theatres to watch rather than luxuriating in how great the movie could have been rather than how it turned out (i.e., it’s not looking good).  In other news, Slender Man, another horror movie of sorts, is something I could have sworn either already came out years ago or was already cancelled years ago but is, instead, apparently opening this weekend as well.  I’d steer clear.  Also, you know it’s the dog days of summer when a movie actually called Dog Days comes out and someone like me writes a horrible sentence like this that starts out with such a tired old writing cliché.  And don’t see that one either, though I’m not objecting to Dog Days as much as the other two.

That’s the end of the bad news though, as BlacKkKlansman looks pretty great and would make for a pretty good chaser if you listened to me and saw Sorry to Bother You earlier this summer like I told you to, The Miseducation of Cameron Post looks like a real peach of a socially relevant movie, Getting Grace could be pretty decent, though it’s hard to tell given the current dearth of critic scores, and Lu Over the Wall looks like a sea of delight in the otherwise horrible ocean of extreme heat that’s been Edmonton in these last few days.  Of our lives.

All of that said, I’m not really that excited about any of this weekend’s new movies, so the one thing I would actually recommend to you to do this weekend at the movies is take part in the post-apocalyptically themed Midnite Til Dawn at Metro Cinema.  From midnight to 6am (I know, I know, I was shocked to find out there’s a six in the morning now too!six in the morning now too!), you can catch some classic end-of-the-world cinema like Logan’s Run and Last Man on Earth alongside movie enthusiasts in their sleeping bags and pillows and various states of post-midnight dress.  It’ll be a really great chance to just celebrate how we can all sense that things are going to end very badly for all of us and how much sooner those things will be happening than we’d, even only a few years ago, been expecting!

We’re all gonna die!

Horribly!

AND SOON!

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