Opening this Weekend
This Weekend’s Box Office Predictions
- Beauty and the Beast
- The Boss Baby
- Ghost in the Shell
- Power Rangers
What You Should See
Rotten Tomatoes score aside, the worst thing I can say about The Boss Baby is that I almost mixed it up with Edgar Wright’s upcoming movie, Baby Driver. While the latter looks like precisely the kind of sleek, sexy weirdness that we should all be looking for in movies, the former… is an animated movie where Alec Baldwin plays the voice of a baby. I would never be able to forgive The Boss Baby if it had caused me to skip Baby Driver. But then there still is that Rotten Tomatoes score. So if there’s one thing I’m trying to say with this paragraph, it’s this: Don’t see The Boss Baby, try to remember to see Baby Driver. I’ll just leave the Baby Driver trailer right here.
Speaking of Rotten Tomatoes, none of this week’s major new releases — the others being Ghost in the Shell and The Zookeeper’s Wife — faired very well on the Tomatometer, and that’s a pretty damning indictment of all the big movies this weekend considering how divisive Ghost in the Shell has been (because of all the whitewashing) and how no one should ever see a movie like The Zookeeper’s Wife (a movie about the Nazi invasion of Warsaw) unless it’s actually good. For the latter, I suppose there’s a joke to be made that at least it’s not the atrocity that would be a sequel to Kevin James’ The Zookeeper, but that seems a little in poor taste considering the subject matter (it is a little eery how close those two movies’ Rotten Tomatoes scores are though). Given how bad everything looks with the weekend’s new releases and the touchy subject of historical human misery and suffering brought on by a monstrous bully of a country in at least one of this week’s new releases, I’m prepared to say that this week’s new releases are the moviegoing equivalent of appointing Rick Perry to Secretary of Energy. I’ve been saving that comparison up for a while, but things really do look that bleak this weekend.
If you must see something this weekend, I’d recommend Metro Cinema’s showing of 1996’s Trainspotting. It’ll be a good prep/recap before seeing its sequel;. this year’s T2: Trainspotting. Y’know, if T2 ever opens here that is.